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Why? People keep asking why my website looks like this. 001Because it's my site and I do what I want. 002Because I could. 003Because I couldn't not. 004Because someone had to. 005Because nobody asked me to. 006Because it was 2 AM and I had coffee. 007Because the modern web is boring. 008Because tables > divs. Fight me. 009Because I miss the old internet. 010Because I don't miss the old internet, I'm bringing it back. 011Because React needed more <table> tags. 012Because my therapist said I need a creative outlet. 013Because CSS variables are a valid personality trait. 014Because 21 themes wasn't enough (it was). 015Because you're here reading this, so clearly it worked. 016Because life is too short for tasteful design. 017Because minimalism is overrated. 018Because I wanted to see if Next.js could handle this level of chaos. 019Because the voices in my terminal told me to. 020Because I have a mortgage and this is cheaper than therapy. 021Because sometimes you just need to build something stupid. 022Because my portfolio needed more personality. 023Because I was procrastinating on actual work. 024Because I wasn't procrastinating, this IS the work. 025Because vibe coding is a legitimate engineering methodology. 026Because I peaked in 2003 and I'm leaning into it. 027Because GeoCities died so this site could live. 028Because phpBB forums were peak web design. 029Because I have 18 synthesizers and needed somewhere to list them. 030Because my CSS file is 1500 lines and I'm not sorry. 031Because you can't spell 'fun' without... well, you can. But still. 032Because I saw a website with rounded corners and felt nothing. 033Because flat design killed my soul. 034Because this brings me joy. 035Because it brings me chaos, which is the same thing. 036Because I wanted a minesweeper page on my portfolio. 037Because adding a minesweeper page to my portfolio was objectively correct. 038Because I ran out of side projects (I didn't). 039Because shipping features is my love language. 040Because 'Senior Developer' means I get to do whatever I want. 041Because the alternative was updating my LinkedIn. 042Because I'd rather write CSS themes than cover letters. 043Because every pixel is a deliberate artistic choice (it's not). 044Because I wanted flying toasters and you can't stop me. 045Because someone needs to keep the <marquee> spirit alive. 046Because my partner asked 'why' and I couldn't explain it either. 047Because 'it sparks joy' is a valid technical requirement. 048Because I want my website to feel like opening a time capsule. 049Because Web 2.0 was a mistake and Web3 was a bigger one. 050Because the best websites are the ones that make you smile. 051Because I was tired of websites that look like every other website. 052Because my site, my rules. 053Because I pay for this domain and I'll use it however I want. 054Because not everything needs to be a SaaS. 055Because not everything needs to be monetized. 056Because not everything needs to be optimized. 057Because not everything needs a dark mode. (But this has 21 of them.) 058Because I was in a mass coding session and couldn't stop. 059Because it's fun. 060Because it's funny. 061Because it's funnier than your website. 062Because the <blink> tag was removed from browsers and I'm still upset. 063Because I unironically love beveled borders. 064Because someone on Hacker News will hate this and that's motivation. 065Because 'best viewed at 800x600' is a lifestyle. 066Because inline styles are a power move. 067Because I wanted to confuse recruiters. 068Because recruiters won't read past the first fold anyway. 069Because I built this with an AI agent and we had a great time. 070Because Claude and I are having a moment and you're interrupting. 071Because I already mass-deployed it and there's no going back. 072Because reverting this would be mass-destruction of art. 073Because my git history is a war crime and I'm at peace with that. 074Because 'wip' is a valid commit message. 075Because I have 305 public repos and needed a place to link 6 of them. 076Because I spent more time on the theme switcher than my actual products. 077Because the Barbie theme exists and the world is better for it. 078Because Hot Dog Stand is the only Windows theme that matters. 079Because BSOD blue is technically a calming color. 080Because I put a Clippy easter egg in my minesweeper clone. 081Because I called it 'Bug Sweeper' and I'm proud of that. 082Because the bugs in my game are intentional (the ones in my code are not). 083Because 'Freelancer on a Friday' is a difficulty level and a lifestyle. 084Because the status bar says 'Billable hrs' and that's comedy gold. 085Because the Game menu has an Exit button that doesn't work. 086Because 'There is no escape from production support.' 087Because I listed my synths and the count keeps going up. 088Because five Access Viruses is a reasonable number. 089Because I made AI-generated music and put it on my professional website. 090Because 'Lil' Backtick' is a legitimate artist name. 091Because I embedded YouTube videos of me playing synthesizers. 092Because I have a song called 'BLOCKED BY CORS' and it slaps. 093Because I have a song called 'TOUCH GRASS PROTOCOL'. 094Because my Suno tracks have better names than my git branches. 095Because I wrote a CMU Coke Machine emulator and listed it as a project. 096Because the original IoT device deserves a tribute. 097Because I made a PNG hex editor for glitch art. In one HTML file. 098Because Token-Oriented Object Notation needed a PHP implementation. 099Because I called my text editor 'Token' and it's written in Rust. 100Because everything is written in Rust now, even my text editor. 101Because I have a 'New & Exciting' section with a blinking HOT badge. 102Because blinking text is an underappreciated art form. 103Because animations make everything better. Everything. 104Because my tech stack grid cells spin on hover and that's important. 105Because the Soviet theme exists and the gold on red goes hard. 106Because the Game Boy theme only uses 4 colors, as God intended. 107Because I made a construction theme with diagonal stripe backgrounds. 108Because 'Under Construction' is a state of mind. 109Because the cyberpunk theme has magenta and cyan borders. 110Because the Sakura theme is actually pretty and I'm surprised too. 111Because my about page bio mentions my 'project graveyard'. 112Because I described my work experience as 'battle scars'. 113Because my cartoon avatar has an objectPosition of 'top center'. 114Because I debugged flying toasters at 2 AM and regret nothing. 115Because animation-duration: 0s is not a valid toast flight time. 116Because setAttribute was the fix and I'll never forget that. 117Because I mass the word 'mass' into every other sentence for fun. 118Because you scrolled this far, which means I win. 119Because there's no prize for scrolling this far. 120Because seriously, go outside. 121Because I should also go outside. 122Because I won't go outside. I'm adding more themes. 123Because the answer to 'why' is always 'why not'. 124Because why not. 125Because. |  |  Helge Sverre Hessevik Liseth VP of Engineering @ Crescat AS Bergen, Norway | |||||||
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